This is the abridged “editor is out of town and doesn’t have an hour to break down a bunch of godawful football games” edition.
Virginia Tech 15, East Carolina 10
In this game, we learned that once is a fluke, twice is a coincidence, but three times is a trend. The Hokies’ offense isn’t very good. The good news is, their defense is.
UL-Monroe 21, Wake Forest 19
Here, we learned that if there were an ACC Draft in 2014, Wake Forest would be on-track for the number one pick. This is so far Jim Grobe’s poorest job yet and his time in Winston-Salem might be coming to an end.
Pittsburgh 49, New Mexico 27
About all we learned in this one is that Pittsburgh can play against teams not from Tallahassee.
USC 35, Boston College 7
We know what we learned here: that Boston College wasn’t destined to get as lucky as Washington State, and that they’re still miles away from where they need to be.
Florida State 62, Nevada 7
We learned here that if they play like this on September 28, Florida State is probably going to smack us like they smacked the Wolf Pack. And it wouldn’t be the first time.
Georgia Tech 38, Duke 14
Here, we learned (more accurately, we were reminded) that Georgia Tech is going to score a lot of points this year, most likely.
Syracuse 54, Wagner 0
In this game, we learned that sometimes, two quarterbacks are better than one. Not for USC in their first two games, but here, definitely.
Maryland 32, Connecticut 21
We again learned a valuable lesson here: that Maryland has definitely improved and could pose a threat to the Eagles getting to six wins.